Chapter 7 – Roundabout

1

As soon as he stepped outside the first floor of his condo complex, his breaths turned white.

He had hoped February would bring about some signs of spring, but the weather forecast only promised bitter cold and possible snowfall. And they had indeed already gotten another layer of powdery snow two days prior.

Eita stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets and stepped out onto Prefectural Route 32, hunching from the cold. He headed down the road a ways. No matter where he wanted to go, he always had to head down that first strip of the road attached to the condo complex. He’d gotten rather used to the walk, and to the normal sights and sounds.

But things didn’t feel the same that day.

It was a weekday morning, just after 10 AM. A time that Eita would normally be in school. His body felt fundamentally opposed to being outside at that time.

Third-years were allowed flexible school attendance starting from February. Because general entrance exams for many colleges were all focused around that time of year, school attendance was only required once a week.

It wasn’t like he was being a truant. But at the same time, Eita couldn’t shake the feeling he was doing something wrong.

Even he thought he was being a bit too inflexible.

But school aside, Eita knew there was another reason for how nervous he felt. The date was so obvious and imposing in his mind.

Thursday, February 15th. The day before his big university entrance exam.

At the same time tomorrow, he’d be struggling through batches of questions in an exam venue.

He had used his limited resources as efficiently as possible. He spent all his time at school and at home in January studying. If he was home, he was hunched over his desk. As of February, with the exception of daily runs, he’d devoted every second of time he had to studying.

Haruto had invited him out a couple of times over the last few weeks, but he’d gently declined. He wanted to tell Haruto about everything, but only once it was all over.

The group LINE chat had been pretty dead, too, in what Eita assumed was a show of consideration towards Mio and her exams. There were just a few stamps sent now and then. But even if the stamps were pointless, Eita thought they were important. He knew all too well how hard it was to re-establish lost contact.

As Eita considered that fact, his phone vibrated in his jacket pocket. He pulled it out, finding a LINE message from Haruto.

At the field.

He quickly responded with a Roger That stamp.

It may have been the day before Eita’s exam, but Haruto had messaged him the night before, saying There’s something I need to talk to you about. Eita asked what it was, but all Haruto would say was Let’s get together to talk about it. In the end, Eita accepted the meeting as a way to clear his mind. He doubted he’d be able to get any real studying in the day before the exam, anyway.

It took Eita about another ten minutes to reach the field Haruto had mentioned. It was a wide-open area right next to the apartment complexes where Haruto lived. Eita remembered the place fondly, as he and Haruto had commonly met there in the past to play catch.

But as Eita glanced from side to side, the place seemed much smaller than he remembered.

He spotted Haruto’s back. The other boy was sitting halfway down the stairs leading down to the field. His body seemed to sag downwards.

As Eita got closer, he yelled out, “Got some good news about Morikawa-san?”

Haruto twitched and turned around, flashing an unexpectedly disgusted look. “Why’s it gotta be about Morikawa?”

“I mean, c’mon, she’s all you’ve been about lately.”

“Well, guess I can’t deny that.” Haruto turned his body to face Eita, still acting somewhat sulky.

Eita sat down one step below Haruto on the stairs. They could just about touch each other if they both reached out. “What, did she dump you or something?” He shot out jokingly.

“Yup. Just yesterday.”

Eita got the complete opposite answer he’d been expecting.

“…Seriously?” He couldn’t bring himself to believe it, given the chemistry between them lately. Especially after Hazuki changed her hairstyle. It seemed like they’d been so much closer since then. “I thought things were gonna work out differently.”

Especially since the day before had been February 14th. Valentine’s Day. Haruto had been crowing on LINE about how Hazuki had asked to meet up with him.

“Then after she dumped me… she asked to go out with me.”

“…Uh, that makes no sense.”

“She just said not yet… only after she settles into school and I get settled into work.” Haruto was speaking calmly, almost looking bored, as if he were talking about someone else.

“Oh. I get it.”

It made sense after a short explanation. Asking to go out with someone right after dumping them. Eita hadn’t known Hazuki for long, but it seemed like exactly the kind of thing she’d do. Rushing into a relationship could cause problems once the physical distance was forced upon them. She probably didn’t want their relationship to be lost in the fallout. It was a level-headed, grounded compromise. Definitely the right play.

“And you’re good with that, Haruto?”

“I haven’t officially agreed to it, but it’s not like I’ve got a choice. Especially when it’s a $300 round-trip.” Haruto showed Eita his phone screen, which was opened to a transit app calculating fare from Fujisawa to Shin-Kobe.

Eita couldn’t help but laugh at the sudden development of the two of them talking about money. It was such an adult thing to talk about. But underneath that veil of maturity was what ultimately sounded like a guy bragging about his love life.

“Hey man, this isn’t a laughing matter.”

“I’ll bet you were going on about visiting her every week, weren’t you?!” Otherwise he wouldn’t have been so stuck on the $300 round trip.

“I’m still gonna do it…” He was talking like a kid that had been caught red-handed. But he didn’t look like a child throwing a tantrum any more. He might not have fully grown into an adult, but he wasn’t a kid any more

“I’m sure you will. Go right ahead. It’s a heck of a lot closer than where I lived in Kyūshū, so you’ll manage. Just make sure you keep in touch. It’s hard to send that next message after you wait too long, you know what I mean?”

Haruto glanced over his shoulder. “Yeah,” he said with a weak smile. “And you stay in contact, too, Eita.”

“Oh, I’ll message from time to time.”

“I mean with Natsume.”

“What’s-” Before Eita could even fully voice his complaint, Haruto threw a knockout punch.

“You‘re taking the entrance exam, right?”

Haruto was looking right at Eita, and Eita couldn’t break eye contact.

“…How’d you know?” Eita finally managed to spit out his question. He’d worked so hard to keep the exam a secret.

“Found out last week or so. Komiya asked me about it. Guess she figured I already knew. She looked just as surprised as you.” Haruto’s gaze turned somewhat resentful. His frustrated gaze seemed to accuse Eita. You always do this, it said. “You didn’t even tell Natsume, did you?”

“I was gonna. If I pass, I’m gonna tell her everything.” Eita turned to face forward, looking out towards the field, trying to find the words to express how he felt.

“Then you better not lose tomorrow.” Haruto leaned forward, lightly punching Eita’s shoulder.

“It’s not about winning or losing.” Eita punched him back.

“All the more reason not to lose.”

It made no logical sense, but the meaning was crystal-clear. Haruto’s classic way of cheering someone on.

After a thoroughly meaningful talk, Eita headed home just before noon.

As Eita passed a convenience store on the way home, he noticed a car slowing down behind him. It honked as it got closer. He turned curiously towards the driver’s seat to find Mio’s older sister Mina.

The car pulled up right beside Eita, and Mina gestured for him to open the door. He obediently opened the door, and Mina immediately commandeered the situation.

“You’re going home, right? Hop in, I gotcha. There’s a car coming behind, so hurry up.”

Without any room to refuse, Eita just followed her lead and got in the passenger seat. The car started moving again before he had even fully buckled his seatbelt.

“Look at you, taking it easy and relaxing all day. You even got any entrance exams, Eita-kun?”

“I’ve decided on a school, for the time being.”

“Well, if you’re saying it like that, it must be a good one, huh?”

“Joei, for the time being.”

“Ooh, nice one.” Mina’s face split into a wide grin. “I get it now,” she said with a strange depth of conviction. The reaction seemed a bit over the top for their meager conversation.

“What is it?”

“Have you talked about entrance exams much with Mio recently?”

Eita couldn’t beat his curiosity, but then Mina went and changed the subject anyway.

“…No. It’s a bit rude to bring up when I have a recommendation.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet she makes this face, huh?” They were stopped at a red light, and Mina imitated Mio’s annoyed face. Their sisterhood really showed in its similarity, and Eita couldn’t stop himself from laughing.

“Mio can be her real self in front of you, Eita-kun.”

Back in middle school, Eita would have been over the moon at that comment. In fact, it was something of a point of pride back then that Mio acted and spoke so frankly in front of him and him alone.

But he couldn’t see it that way any more. He knew that the only reason she would be her true self was because she didn’t see Eita as someone worth keeping up an appearance for. She didn’t want him to think she was cute, or want to show off her cool side to him.

In a way, it was technically special. But not in the way Eita wanted to be special.

He had already accepted that. He couldn’t change that reality.

But that was okay. In the same way, his feelings for her were an unchangeable reality. All he had to do was chase after what he wanted with everything he had.

Regret wouldn’t turn back the clock, and it wouldn’t change the exam dates. Tomorrow was inevitable.

The light flicked green, and the car lurched forward.